


The Avengers Holiday Pot Luck

by pinkhairedharry



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Feelstide 2014, Gen, M/M, Multi, Not Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Compliant, Not Canon Compliant, Not Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, idk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-27 05:54:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2681600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkhairedharry/pseuds/pinkhairedharry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers and company do a holiday pot luck.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Avengers Holiday Pot Luck

**Author's Note:**

> set in a vague time frame a few years after the Avengers.

The Avengers Winter Holiday Pot Luck

 

The annual Avengers Winter Holiday pot luck was never going to be the most traditional of meals. Usually they agreed on a type of cuisine (such as Mediterranean or Chinese) before hand but this year had been more hectic then previous years. By the time someone had noticed the date they'd just agreed to make whatever they wanted. 

Clint had decided on circus style funnel cake. It wasn't that he couldn't cook; he was definitely one of the best cooks in the tower. He wouldn't say he was the actual best because the half of them that could cook all had different strengths. Clint was the reigning champ at “turning random assortments of crap into edible dishes”. It also wasn't that he'd never had a so called normal holiday meal. Phil had been taking him home for various holidays since well before they'd gotten together. Last year he'd even cooked the Coulson Family Thanksgiving turkey. This week he was sporting a few cracked ribs, feeling nostalgic and craving sugar. 

Phil had actually put in a lot of thought on what he wanted to make. He was only slightly better off than Clint from the last wanna-be super-villain but he was also pretty sure this years pot luck was going to be heavy on sugar and light on everything else. Even bruised and slightly concussed he was sure on that so he decided on a brown sugar and honey glazed spiral ham. As a man that had grown up helping his over worked and underpaid widowed mother raise four younger sisters Phil knew his way around the kitchen. He was by no means a professional chef but no one could say he was less than good. Meat dishes were his bread and butter.

Natasha made tiny cream puffs because her culinary skills revolved around deserts. Her training in the Red Room had included culinary training such as which seasonings/herbs/spices could cover the taste of poisons. The Black Widow had been an admirable student. Natasha on the other hand enjoyed baking. She and Clint had regular bake offs when they got bored. They had made many “a little weird but wonderful” delights over the years.

Bruce made spicy vegetarian samosas. He'd developed a taste for spicy foods during his years on the run and most of the others agreed with his the spicier the better motto. The few that didn't knew better than to eat anything he cooked.

Betty made Bruce's favorite Pumpkin Pie. A graham cracker crust with a layer of mixed cream cheese and cool whip under a layer of pumpkin filling under another layer of cool whip. It was a pain in the butt to make but absolutely delicious. 

Tony refused to cook on the grounds that no one wanted food poisoning for the holiday but had ordered a basic spread of finger foods (by which I mean chips, dip, cheese cubes and other inexpensive party snacks). 

Pepper made (ordered) a couple of fruit platter (to go with Tony's snacks) because she's pretty sure the avengers and their various People will develop scurvy if someone doesn't provide them with fruit once in a while. They devoured fruit if it was in front of them but very few of them remembered to buy/order any (Jarvis was not all knowing no matter what Tony says. He needed to be told if you wanted anything other than the basics). Also because she was the CEO of a mulch-billion dollar international corporation she wouldn't waste her precious time off cooking for a group of oddballs that ninety nine times out of hundred would choose to eat a grilled cheese sandwich over five star cuisine.

Rhodey brought an Oreo cheesecake because Tony and Pepper (as well as himself) loved it and it's fucking awesome. 

Thor brought Asgardian mead, because it's not a feast without mead. 

Jane brought ice cream because cooking anything but the basics was outside her skill set but home made ice cream was just tasty science. 

Darcy had decided on her grandma's famous green bean casserole because that's what you ate at Christmakkah at the Lewis household. She was also the reigning champ at “things grandmothers and aunties make just for you” style cooking. It was a well loved talent. It came in handy when feeding her favorite super-soldiers.

Steve decided on mashed potatoes because it's simple and he knows everyone will eat it. He wasn't much of a cook. He could feed himself but almost everything he made was edible at best and “hadn't killed him or Bucky but Darcy refused to eat it because it probably would kill her” at worst. 

Sam brought baked mostaccioli because pasta is fantastic and he's awesome at it. Sam was the reigning champ at “no super hunger left undefeated” style cooking. 

Bucky made four attempts at his mother's homemade stuffing before giving up. It just wouldn't taste right, too many chemicals and crap. He ended up getting eight boxes of the ridiculously cheap but surprisingly delicious stove top kind. He and Steve ended up eating a box on their own before they made it off their floor. 

Maria made the most awesome smelling and tasting apple pie. It's her go to pot luck dish and it had never failed her. She knew but didn't care that at least half of the others, if not more, were going to bring deserts. She was definitely planning on leaving well before the sugar overload set in. Barton, Lewis, Stark, Docs Ross and Foster were like five year olds when on a sugar high but their respective other halves (thirds in Darcy's case) were the ones that would have to deal with them. 

Jasper brought his Romanoff certified amazing creme brulee and turkey empanadas. He was just as certain as Phil was that this year would be heavy on sugar and light on substance. He also didn't care for the same reason as Maria. They'd both be gone before all hell broke loose. His mother had gotten Maria to promise they'd come visit.

Nick Fury had a standing invitation to the Avengers Winter Holiday Pot Luck but always declined on account of spending time with his “classified so high no one knows about them but very real” family that included a lovely wife, three happily married children and seven adorably smartass grandchildren. He sent a tray of his wife's homemade chocolate caramel fudge.

 

When everything was set out they all just kind of stared at the mostly random assortment of food. Some were things they normally ate but very little of it actually worked together. The only thing that had vegetables other than potatoes was Darcy's green bean casserole (and everyone agreed that didn't really count). 

"We're actually going to get diabetes and go into food comas," announced Darcy before she started snickering.

"YOLO," deadpanned Bucky causing everyone to start laughing.

Clint looked around at the collection of people (that were more diverse than the food they were going to eat) that had become family before adding, “Life goals.”

 

\---------------------------------------the end------------------------------------------


End file.
